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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29098065">the only reason</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/pinksunlight'>pinksunlight (orphan_account)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>we were raised under grey (pink, black, peach, brown) skies [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>? - Freeform, Beaches, Childhood Friends, Feelings Realization, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Graduation, KISSING at sunset, M/M, Sunsets, all my fics are just getting together, bc that's what this is babey, have you ever heard of a lack of clear conversations as a love language?, this went over my word limit bc i got too invested :/</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 13:07:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,602</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29098065</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/pinksunlight</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Donghyuck lets out a laugh of disbelief, eyes shining as he tucks a stray strand of Mark’s hair back behind his ear. He only giggles more when Mark pinches his side, sliding his hands naturally over his waist to draw him a little closer. “I’m telling your mom that her son broke my heart if you don’t answer me right now.”</p><p>This seems to set Donghyuck off in another direction as he groans, “Oh my god, our parents. It’s gonna be so awkward when we tell them.”</p><p>“Tell them what?” Mark asks innocently. “There’s nothing to tell. Unless…”</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>we were raised under grey (pink, black, peach, brown) skies [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2121540</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>193</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>the only reason</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>
  <br/>
  <i><a href="https://open.spotify.com/album/3cS0qzNDjE5SjdAL1W98fo?highlight=spotify:track:3w1xg3rt6XZ8GLVuzmW5Vn">it</a> started out in springtime<br/>against the golden skyline<br/>you spoke to me at last<br/>it started out intensely<br/>and within all my senses i knew<br/>i'm sure i knew</i>
</p><p>  <i>say, i will al.. - i will always love you<br/>and when the wind gets cold<br/>i'll wrap my arms around you</i></p><p>  <i>we shared our dreams, endeavors and many things</i><br/>we never could tell a soul before</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>If someone were to sit Mark down and ask him what kind of person Donghyuck is, he wouldn’t have to think twice before saying, <em>the bravest. </em></p><p>He’s brave at 5 years old with a permanent rosiness to his cheeks and nose (the kind that hasn’t persisted into later years, but still shows up some days after spending hours under the hot summer sun), new to Canada and the concept of “family friends”. He waits all but two seconds after the door shuts behind him to spin around in Mark’s room and tell him that he plans on going back to Korea tomorrow, so <em>I’m not gonna play with you because I don’t care about people who are not Korean. </em></p><p>Mark blinks, wonders if he should tell him that he <em>is</em> Korean, and then thinks better of it when he sees Donghyuck’s little scowl. So, he shrugs and goes back to playing with his Legos.</p><p>He only looks back up, horrified and praying that his parents don’t hear anything downstairs, when Donghyuck bursts into tears a few moments later, still standing at the door in his yellow overalls with pudgy cheeks that are growing ruddier by the second.</p><p>It takes ten minutes of frantic shushing, pats on the back that are definitely a bit too hard, and a total of three chocolate chip cookies from Mark’s hidden stash until Donghyuck finally calms down, face wet and splotchy. He sniffs, wipes the crumbs off his face, and throws his arms around Mark, announcing firmly, “We’re best friends now.”</p><p>And Mark may be 6 years old, but he’s not <em>dumb</em>, so he nods and awkwardly pats his new best friend on the back.</p><p>Donghyuck remains brave throughout the years. Starting school with a spectacular smile for someone who doesn’t know a lick of English, even when Mark has to let go of his hand so he can get to his own class. Proudly joining the junior choir in grade 5 as the only boy despite how often the other boys pick on him because of it. Blurting out that he’s bisexual about five seconds after Mark comes out to him as gay (at 13 and 14, they haven’t held hands while coming home from school in a while, but Mark still slots their fingers together after hearing Donghyuck’s voice shake).</p><p>Mark offhandedly mentions Yukhei Wong being a little agrressive the other day at soccer practice as he leans against Donghyuck’s locker, waiting for him to grab his lunch, and the next time he goes to practice Yukhei has a giant bruise on his shin (“Some idiot kicked me in the halls between classes and I fell, you should see my knees.”).</p><p>Mark graduates and says his goodbyes with his things packed up in the back of his old pick-up truck, but Donghyuck doesn’t so much as hug him, much less cry (“You’re three hours away, it’s no big deal.”) ((Mark never does tell Donghyuck that he saw the way his face screwed up in the rear-view mirror as he drove away down the street)).</p><p>Donghyuck’s always been brave, except, oddly enough, it takes a year of not living right next door to each other for Mark to see through Donghyuck, find the impenetrable brick wall built around his heart only to find that it’s covered in cracks.</p><p>Mark shakes the thoughts out of his head. He’s not here for that. He hears Donghyuck’s name being called out and watches as he walks across the stage in a blue gown with a grin that’s become more charming than cheeky over the years. Mark can hear the distinct whooping and screeching from Jeno, Jaemin and Renjun, and Donghyuck is clearly trying to hold back laughter as he shakes hands with the Principal and accepts his rolled up diploma (that Mark knows to be just a stand-in blank piece of paper for the theatrics of it all).</p><p>When the Principal finally congratulates the graduating class, Mark goes to stand up to cheer with Donghyuck’s family and everyone else in the room. He’s clapping as loud as he can when Donghyuck’s mom presses a hand to his shoulder and says, keeping her eyes on Donghyuck, proud and a little sad, “I didn’t think he’d ever be able to leave my side when we came here, and now he’s going to be moving across the country for four years.”</p><p>Mark’s hands stop mid-clap.</p><p>“You’ve been a very good friend to him, Minhyung-ah, thank you.”</p><p>She squeezes his shoulder, and he clears his throat and finds it in him to smile. “You don’t have to thank me, he’s been—an even better friend to me.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Donghyuck doesn’t see Mark right away. He spots his parents and lights up, fighting his way through families after the ceremony, clad in a dress shirt and slacks now that he doesn’t have to wear his gown. When he does spot Mark he slows for a moment, the slightest bit of hesitation on his face before he seems to shake it off and breaks out into a real smile, walking faster and faster until he’s almost running and then he’s got his arms around Mark’s waist, pressing as close as he possibly can.</p><p>“You came!” Donghyuck exclaims, not sounding a bit like he’s been avoiding contact with Mark for the past few months.</p><p>Mark wraps his arms around Donghyuck’s shoulders and lets out a happy little noise, ignoring the camera Donghyuck’s dad points at them as he replies in his ear, “And you’ve been keeping secrets. UBC?”</p><p>Donghyuck pulls back quickly with a sheepish smile, but there’s an underlying hint of fear. The flash goes off right as Mark rolls his eyes playfully, ruffling Donghyuck’s hair to convey the silent, <em>we’re okay. </em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It takes little convincing to get Donghyuck’s parents to let them hang out on their own for a while, Donghyuck and his friends never having paid for prom anyway. The evening finds Mark driving down to the beach under a sunset-streaked sky of deep pinks and oranges. Donghyuck stays half-turned in his seat to talk to Jaemin and Jeno and Renjun who are squished into the backseat, bright laughter and loud voices filling up the small space all the way to the beach.</p><p>Mark brings his car up too close to the shoreline upon Donghyuck’s insistence, and then he sits on the edge of the flatbed as Donghyuck and the others play around at the water’s edge, silhouettes against a vibrant background. Donghyuck grabs Renjun and tries dragging him into the water, screeching when Jaemin frees Renjun and turns on him instead.</p><p>They paint a fun, carefree picture, one unscathed by the future that sits a summer away, and in the moment, it really does feel like Mark’s eyes were only made to look at Donghyuck, soak in his joy, radiant as ever with the wind blowing through his hair, his shirt.</p><p>He doesn’t even notice that Donghyuck’s broken away from the group, too caught up in just looking at him until suddenly, Donghyuck’s standing right in front of him clearing his throat, not quite between Mark’s legs, but close. Mark blinks and then flushes at being caught, letting out a rough, “Hey.”</p><p>“Hey,” Donghyuck laughs. He drops his gaze to lean next to Mark, the small of his back digging into the flat bed. “You know you didn’t have to come. Here or grad, but I’m really glad you did.”</p><p>Mark shakes his head, tracking the way golden light spills out onto the water, it concentrates the lower the sun gets. “My best friend just made it through four years of hell, of course I had to come.”</p><p>Donghyuck snorts, crossing his arms. “Yeah, to enter another four years of hell. Except this time, I’ll be surrounded by strangers. Great plan.”</p><p>“When were you planning on tell me about that, by the way?”</p><p>It comes out casually, but Mark’s been thinking about this for months, if he’s being honest.</p><p>A lot had changed since Mark had headed off to UWO. London, Ontario isn’t too far from Toronto, but it’s the furthest he’s ever stayed from home, from Donghyuck. They talked all the time, of course they did, the pressures of grade 12 and first year at university needed to be shared with someone, and who better than your best friend?</p><p>Mark never minded Donghyuck facetiming him at the dead hours of the night or mass-texting him in the middle of class or sending him snaps of his mom’s cooking because Donghyuck spent way too much time at Mark’s house even when he wasn’t there.</p><p>And then, somewhere, a switch flipped, and suddenly there was something <em>more</em>. The <em>I miss you</em>s started feeling more loaded and Donghyuck started to flush a pretty pink when Mark ended their calls with his usual <em>love you</em>s and Mark still didn’t mind. He liked it. He liked Donghyuck (and honestly, a part of him knew that he always had, he just needed some distance to figure it out).</p><p>But Donghyuck started making himself scarcer and scarcer as spring came to a close. He’d avoided talking about apps all of winter, and eventually the texts and calls dwindled down to none, and before Mark knew it, it’d been a month and he hadn’t heard a thing from Donghyuck.</p><p>Wide, gaping cracks so obvious that Mark wondered how he’d missed them in the first place.</p><p>“I… don’t even know.” Donghyuck grimaces, scuffing his shoe against the sand. “I’m sorry. I didn’t—I just couldn’t tell you. Not when, um. I just couldn’t.”</p><p>Donghyuck is so brave, but Mark has always been his one weakness. It’s a satisfying thought. Grounding. Like something slotting into place. The wind has gotten cooler now, but it’s pleasant, smoothing over them instead of pricking at their skin.</p><p>“I get it. British Columbia though, long way from home.” <em>From me.</em> “If there’s anyone who can do it, it’s you, I guess.”</p><p>“I mean sure, you’d think that,” Donghyuck says, like Mark’s opinion isn’t the most secure.</p><p>“What does that mean?”</p><p>“That you refuse to see the worst in other people.”</p><p>“Hard to see what’s not there.”</p><p>“<em>Hyung.</em>”</p><p>“<em>Hyuck</em>.”</p><p>Donghyuck scrunches up his nose distastefully, the way he always does when Mark’s being difficult, and it’s enough for Mark to crack and put on an easy smile, nudging him with an elbow. “Dude, I know you’re scared, but you’re gonna be okay.”</p><p>He laughs self-deprecatingly, “Yeah, friendless and penniless. It’ll be a blast.”</p><p>Donghyuck’s brave like this: moving across the country at the tender age of 18 even though he’s smart enough to know that it won’t be easy because it’s what he needs, what he’s always dreamed of. Donghyuck has never been one to shy away from adventure, but more than that he’s never been one to shy away from growth, whether he knows it or not.</p><p>“Not friendless, you’ll always have me.”</p><p>“Real far.”</p><p>“We’ll make it work,” Mark shrugs, and then he pulls Donghyuck to stand in front of him, right between his legs. Donghyuck looks nervous as Mark takes his hands in his own, but he doesn’t look away. “Now tell me what’s really up?”</p><p>The sun has just touched the horizon, and Jaemin is pulling Renjun and Jeno down to sit next to him on the sand to watch. Donghyuck sags a bit in front of him, fingers playing with Mark’s. “I’m scared to be alone. I can’t tell Mom or Dad that because they’d worry too much, and the guys are great but they’re all going to the same University. I’m the only one who’s gonna be so far away. Growing up is so fucking scary, hyung, because I <em>want </em>to change! I do! But it feels like—it feels like if I change like this, so far away from everything and everyone I’ve ever loved, eventually, I won't be loved back anymore. I just wish things were like this, forever.”</p><p>“Just you and me?”</p><p>Donghyuck scoffs, but he can’t quite meet Mark’s eyes. “You’re pushing it, Lee.”</p><p>“You know what I think?” Mark asks, shrugging off his jacket so he can gently place it around Donghyuck’s shoulders, covering up the goosebumps on his arms. Jaemin or Renjun lets out a whoop. Donghyuck looks like he’s plotting their murder. “I think that every single possible version of you would be way too loveable to ever unlove. Change is scary, Hyuck, but never changing is scarier, don’t you think?”</p><p>Donghyuck swallows, and then nods slowly. Mark can tell he’s turning the words over in his head by the way he chews on his lower lip.</p><p>“Will you call me everyday?” The sky is starting to darken, but the sun has yet to disappear. Donghyuck’s got that rosiness to his cheeks and nose that Mark’s grown to love so much.</p><p>“Yeah,” Mark agrees easily, because it’s <em>Donghyuck</em>.</p><p>“Sing me to sleep?” Donghyuck bites back a teasing smile.</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>“…Wait for me?”</p><p>Mark doesn’t even have to think, “No.”</p><p>Donghyuck’s face falls. “No?”</p><p>“No,” Mark confirms. “Why wait? You have me now, Hyuck. You always have. Do I have you?”</p><p>Donghyuck lets out a laugh of disbelief, eyes shining as he tucks a stray strand of Mark’s hair back behind his ear. He only giggles more when Mark pinches his side, sliding his hands naturally over his waist to draw him a little closer. “I’m telling your mom that her son broke my heart if you don’t answer me right now.”</p><p>This seems to set Donghyuck off in another direction as he groans, “Oh my god, our parents. It’s gonna be so awkward when we tell them.”</p><p>“Tell them what?” Mark asks innocently. “There’s nothing to tell. Unless…”</p><p>“Shut up, oh my god.” A pause. “Fine, yeah.”</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>“<em>Yeah</em>, you have me, idiot. If you couldn’t already tell from how painfully obvious I’ve been.”</p><p>Brave, brave Donghyuck. Mark’s learning to be brave with him, too.</p><p>“Oh, I could tell,” Mark grins, wrapping his arm around Donghyuck’s waist until there’s almost no space between them. He tries not to let his focus falter when Donghyuck licks his lips, and then he’s leaning in closer and closer until Donghyuck’s eyes have fluttered shut and his lips are slightly parted and he can count every single one of his eyelashes and— "I think your friends are waiting for you, might wanna watch the sunset with them.”</p><p>Mark gently pushes Donghyuck away, who stumbles back a bit and then stands there in complete confusion and minor irritation as he swings around to look at his friends, who all immediately turn their heads away as inconspicuously as possible (which is to say, in the most glaringly obvious way they can). Only Renjun turns around to peek again, and he throws out a supportive, “Show him what you’ve got, Hyuck!” before quickly looking away again.</p><p>“Oh, I will,” Donghyuck mutters menacingly as he marches up to Mark, pulls him off the flat bed to stand, grabs the neck of his shirt, and yanks him down into a kiss, nearly falling over before Mark brings up his hands to wrap around his waist, keeping him upright.</p><p>There’s a lot of screaming and the sun has probably sank into the horizon and their parents are <em>never</em> going to let them stay in a room with the door closed again but all of that melts away when Donghyuck slides a hand up to grip the back of his neck, kissing him deeper.</p><p>It feels like a lot of things, but Mark settles that what it feels like most is being brave.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i literally rmbrd last minute that there was supposed to be a quick little thing of mark taking a picture of the sunset but i forgot. anyways that's what imaginations are for!</p><p> </p><p>  <a href="https://twitter.com/punksunlight">twt</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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